personally, i think ability to be understanding is very important...if there's anything i've gained from being of chinese-malay mixed parentage, it is the chance to explore the meaning of 'understanding' from a young age, growing up in typical malay & chinese surroundings, at once...and the more i think about it, the more i feel that in a society as diversed as ours, we have no choice but to understand each other better if we are to settle down as a matured nation...
equilibrium in how different parts of our society would interact and co-exist can be sought by many ways.. we had 'pecah & perintah' which did its job in defining how malaysians 'interacted' by limiting interaction.. then we were forced upon us rules of engagement in inter-race relations: what was ok, what was sensitive, what was taboo...basically, in the above, equilibrium was defined or imposed by someone who obviously was powerful enough to have such abilities..
in economics, we simplify reality into simple equations with few variables, yet, to great effect of usefully predicting real life reactions to changes in variables...to deliver my point, i'll use a simple example of a boy & a girl...
if a boy & a girl go out dating and have their elders show them 'the way' or follow the book, say, 'a dummy's guide to dating'...they'll probably be fine in 'equilibria' as they are controlled and they operate within set limits...but a boy is a boy and a girl is a girl and different creatures they are! if the elder is no more or has no more influence, if they realized the book was actually written by a dummy, how would the relationship go?
i reckon there'd be awkward moments, angry moments, unintended mistakes, and hearts breaking...haywire..
it's like a software with syntax error..football team without a coach...
unless, the couple had already attained this good understanding of each other...they are different individuals yet they can tolerate each other because they understand each other..know where the other's been, see where the other's coming from...then they will not have problems reaching the equilibrium without much intervention.. (or at least 'trading within a steady band' as forex analysts would say which what i believe equilibrium really looks like)
so there, the second way to equilibrium as opposed to authoritarian approach: self discovery, which i believe is where we need to be headed because authority changes with it the belief it carries, and if there was good authority it can never stand forever ... and key to equilibrium via self discovery is the ability to understand..
in my view, to understand is to appreciate the process of how something happened...many people tolerate without first understanding, hence, peace thru such toleration is very much imaginary...because when toleration reaches it's boundary, there is no strong foundation laid by understanding or "appreciation of the underlying mechanics" to keep cool heads and maintain rationality...
in an age where our society is growing up...we will be tested time after time, and even more so now that there is no overwhelmingly strong 'invisible hand' & society achieving more freedom of thought...
group after group of people will react stupidly to a certain matter which they can't comprehend...it takes the rest of society to understand where they come from in order to deal with the situation better...im not saying we tolerate wrong acts, but im saying condemning wrong acts shouldn't just stop there...understanding them should be the immediate next step so that we can remedy the underlying problem...so that we know which path not to take..we treat the illness, not the symptoms..
for example...if we understand that terrorism had arisen from the ashes of oppression and poverty, governments will know that it must treat its citizen right and encourage an environment where everyone can provide for themselves...normal citizens will also know to respect each other and look out for one another...
finally, we must realize how naive our society is when it comes to understanding each other in malaysia... we must know that many malaysians still do not go/prefer not to go beyond their racial roots for friends...misunderstandings are everywhere...and we must not rush things... it takes more than a lifetime and certainly more than a slogan or mass marketing campaign to develope a matured society... experience will be malaysia's great teacher and to learn, we must be ready to understand...so remind ourselves and our kids to understand more...we will do malaysia much good...
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