i am on dial up internet!

My internet had been down for nearly a week now...i dont know what the problem is...i spent a whole day yesterday talking to the tech assistant from my ISP, and then from my modem company (coz modem not supported by my ISP), then back to ISP...and conclusion - they lodge a faulty report to Telstra for my adsl line...so telstra la yang slack ek?

Suddenly i remembered..i have back up dial up from my ISP! oh, dial up internet had never been so meaningful in my life....i almost forgot how it felt like being on a dial up connection...even when i go back to malaysia (where my house uses a dial up connection), i dont go online at all....

Last weekend had been crazy: a not-so-secret project that is not yet finished....malaysia fest meeting and practices...EKLIPSE dance party...masca meeting...oh gosh...i spent friday to monday at zek's place...gila...might as well move to d city rite?

oh by the way, about dance parties...i would like to make a statement, so that if anyone is actually unsure, here are the facts to get it all straight (not that i worry about what people say, but at least i stated my case, and people have a choice of what to believe)...

i go to dance parties coz its my responsibility being in the uni clubs committee...while i dont fancy it, i have nothing against it, and i shall (as i have proven) carry out my responsibility... i have been to absolutely none before i am part of the uni club committee, and i dont see myself going to any after my days are over, except for giving face to good friends and the msa ... i never ever had alcoholic drink even if i stay at parties from beginning to the end ... and i have lots of people as witness to what i claim.

and that is the truth

MOVING OUT NOTICE =)

next year...if the allowance from mara changes (according to the very very strong rumours that allowance would increase to 1000+ p/m)...i think i would be staying in the city...sumwhere in d CBD or maybe sumwhere near d beach...aihhhh....

dont get me wrong...i really like it here at macquarie..i've loved it since i first arrive and i never regret coming here...but after 3 years, i just feel like having a change...but dunno la...maybe i will just stay here...its really just a thought rite now...

sumtimes i dont know where i belong...

i am up here at macquarie with a bunch of great people...some i call my brothers and sisters.but i hate myself for not spending as much time as i would like to...work takes me to the city almost every weekend...and i sumtimes feel disconnected...frustrated when being around and not understanding some jokes and not knowing what the topic is...when being with a whole group who have been together for so long and sumtimes have to sit through some inside jokes and stories and go, "oo...like that..err, who is so and so?"...

its frustrating to be that disconnected....

and at the same time...i spend almost a third of my week down in the city with some other group of friends that i really fancy...most of the times at randwick with zek...other times with my friends from unisyd...my own MARA batch mates...and after spending some time with some of my friends here, i think...hmm, damn, do i know these people anymore? names keep coming up...new names of new faces in sydney...and i go, "oh, who?" and they go, "ala, ko x kenal kot"...sumtimes i dont need to be with a whole group...just with 2 people is enough to make me feel like so shit when so much had happened that both knows, and i go.."errr, what?"...

and there are also friends from my clubs and socs work...well, sometimes its really fun hanging out....but sumtimes...you know where u stand when, for example, u thought so and so are close to you...but u r not even invited to so and so's birthday party...it really tells a lot..

it is indeed the case of N+1 ... how i wish it would just be N ... but the truth is... i feel like that +1 all the time ... sometimes its my fault ... i am in the situation where i cant be with the N i would like to be with as much as i wished...sumtimes i was part of the N ... but after long disconnected...i turn into the +1....

in the past few years, it has been N+1, X+1, Y+1 for me... N's X's and Y's are spend a lot of time together...all share a lot of things together...all 'talked in their own languages'....it is sumtimes frustrating being me... the +1 ...